Gas station funny

As most of you know, I have a PT Cruiser. I went from a high-top van (great for family, but horrible on gas) to my little PT. We bought this knowing that our days of hauling kids around to dance lessons or camp were behind us. I have never, ever looked backward and wished I had the old van back.

When I go to the gas station, a $20.00 bill will generally be enough gas to take me around for about a week. If I have to go downtown or somewhere off my beaten path, then I have to ante up a bit more.

I was really low on gas and was going to dinner and then downtown to see a show, so I knew I was going to have to stop to get gas. Bob was home when I was leaving and asked why I was leaving so early. When I told him I had to stop for gas, he very generously gave me $40.00 and told me to fill up. My momma didn't raise no fool, I took his cash, knowing full well that my little car would only hold $30.00 worth of gas, and kissed him on his pointed little head.

I pulled into the station and went inside to pay. I paid for $30.00 and then I then came out and began pumping my gas.

All was well until the pump kicked off at $28.00. I didn't want to go back inside and argue with them to get my 2 bucks back and I am too cheap to let them keep my 2 bucks, so I put my knee on the back bumper of my car and began rocking my car. Now, this is a trick that I have known about forever. It simply allows any bubbles to pop from the gas and/or allows the gas to fill every nook and cranny of the gas tank. Bottom line is that you can get more gas into your tank. As I was rocking and squeezing off pennies of gas, I noticed a car had pulled up behind me. This rocking process takes a minute or two, so the car behind me got tired of waiting and pulled into the bay next to me. The car was a fairly new PT cruiser. The driver got out and looked at me for a moment. I thought, "Holy crap, she is gonna go off on me for taking so long!!" She walked up to me and said "Excuse me, I just got my PT Cruiser today and was watching you fill your car with gas. Why are you jumping up and down on the bumper?" My first thought was, "Wait a darned minute, I was not jumping up and down on the bumper like some monkey, are you really that old of a lady that you don't know the difference between jumping and rocking?" Then I noticed that she was about my age, so I amended my thought to "This sweet young thing has led a sheltered life and does not know the difference between jumping and gently rocking." Anyway, I launch into my answer..."Well, you see, my sweet husband gave me money for gas and I want to get every penny of gas I can from his money." She looked at me like I was crazy so I felt the need to expound on the answer..." You know when it is your money, when the pump stops, no big deal, but when your hubby gives you money for gas, you want to get the most bang for his buck, get it?" She had a strange look on her face but said "OH,I thought it was something that the dealer had forgotten to tell me about the mechanics of the car. Thank You".

I felt so good knowing that I had helped out a fellow woman...that is until I was driving down the road, replaying the whole conversation, and realized that the entire time she was responding to me, she was slowly backing up to the safety of her car. You sure meet some strange people these days...I meant her....NOT me!


By the way, I was able to squeeze off almost all of the $30.00 pre-pay. I donated less than 10 cents and because Bob gave me $40.00 for gas, I made 10 bucks off the whole deal. I would say that it was a pretty profitable day.